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Last year, I decided that I had reached my limit. After months of coming home from work too tired to play with my daughter, barely smiling at my husband and spending weekends confined to bed, I finally realized that I was in a bad place.
I was living in a city that I didn’t feel attached to, in a job that I didn’t really like and too tired (or too depressed) to make any changes. I wanted to be closer to family and to feel more connected to my community. I felt like I was barely living. I was wasting time.
After a stressful week at work, I finally broke down sobbing to my husband.
I can’t take it. I don’t want to work there anymore. I don’t want to work for anyone. I want to change my life.
What do you want to do?
I don’t know. Something different.
Let’s move…to South America. Let’s take a six month sabbatical and take language immersion classes. Then we can travel to different cities and do volunteer work. Nana will be fluent in Spanish. We’ll have an amazing time.
I was completely serious. But, yeah…uhm. That didn’t fly.
I’m blessed though. Because my husband didn’t dismiss my distress. We talked about it. And talked about it. And kept talking about it.
It took a few weeks of iterative discussions before we finally settled on moving back to one of our hometowns. I would focus on my daughter and getting a web business up and running and he would continue to focus on his career. After considering cost of living and job markets, we decided to move back to my hometown.
It took six months of discussion, planning, saving money, spending money, freak outs, calm down sessions and true commitment to get us ready to make the move.
When I finally announced at work that I was leaving, I was met with both absolute delight and incredulity. I had to remind myself that someone’s response to your plans are often reflections of their personal situation. Their responses often have nothing to do with you.
People that are happy with their lives want others to be happy too. Those who want to change but haven’t found their way will meet you with resistance. Ignore them.
It’s been a month and it has been the best decision that I could have made. I haven’t laid in bed a single day yet. I’m homeschooling my daughter. I’m cooking everyday. I’m hanging out with my family. I’m reconnecting with friends. I’m getting involved in my community. I’m dating my husband. I’m happy.
Changing your life isn’t necessarily easy, but for me, it was essential. Every day you get to make a choice in how you are going to live your life.