Quiet Before the Storm

I’ve been pretty quiet over here.  Nothing has been happening over here on the foster care front but I do have a couple of updates from the last one

  1. The “in-the-air” situation that I discussed on the last foster care update was little Roly.  We actually did respite for her again the weekend before last.  However, I’ve been told that the guardian ad-litem is really pushing for a kinship placement.  Maybe one day I’ll be able to talk more about this situation but in this case, I appreciate the GAL working hard and looking at her case with  long-term frame of mind.  I know the GAL can present some challenges for families looking to adopt but they are important in providing an advocate for the voiceless. 
  2. We were called about a private adoption – one of the adoption agencies had an African-American boy born and no family interested in adopting him.   She made it clear that there would be a fee involved.  Wood and I discussed and although we could go home in the next couple of days with a newborn, we didn’t feel like it was the right fit for our family.  I didn’t even ask about the fee. 
  3. On the 11-month old girl – we didn’t make it to the next phase for the RAS
  4. We have not received any calls from emergency foster care.  This seems very surprising.
  5. Our name has been placed in the hat for a four-month old.  We shall see.

I had a conversation with our agency worker last week and she is surprised that we have submitted our homestudy for at least two situations and have not even made it to the RAS.  She says that we have most of the dynamics that case workers are looking for:  African-American, married, fairly young, educated, live in a nice neighborhood, financially stable.  However, we still aren’t being chosen.  

She thinks that there is something in our homestudy that may be turning case workers away. 

Wood and I have reviewed our homestudy and we there were some assessments that we did not agree with.  We were pretty new to process and a bit unsure about how much we could push, but when we review this time, we will be a little bit more forceful about things that are not a correct assessment of our family dynamic or history.  

So it’s pretty quiet now.  We continue to wait.  


2 thoughts on “Quiet Before the Storm

  1. My husband and I wonder how the whole process works for selecting foster parents in these legal risk cases. According to our case worker, a CPS case worker will put out the call for home studies, and who knows how many they receive.

    Let’s say they receive 30 home studies from different agencies around the state. Each home study is 20-30 pages EACH, so they are getting 600 – 900 pages to read for just one case! Imagine if 50 home studies are submitted for that one child!

    Who has time to read all of that? I highly doubt overworked case workers have the time to read through it all and make an informed decision about which families are the best candidates. I wonder if they look for key demographic information like you suggested. Or perhaps they favor families from agencies with whom they’ve worked before.

    I remember agonizing about it a lot last spring as we kept getting turned down for case after case with no feedback about why we weren’t selected. It didn’t help that friends and family kept asking, innocently enough, how things were going and if we’d gotten any good news yet. Getting rejected over and over and having to tell people about it repeatedly is not good for morale.

    As for not being called for an emergency placement, that took us a while, too. We didn’t get our first call for an emergency placement until May of last year. We eventually learned that part of the reason we weren’t getting called is because we are interested in taking in only one or two kids. While one or two kids sounds like a handful to me, it turns out that many emergency placements involve larger families, at least where we live. Our case worker told us that if we were interested in taking 4, 5, 6, or more kids, we’d get a call VERY fast.

    Best of luck to you keeping a positive attitude while you wait. It’s frustrating to know there are kids out there who need a home – we are bombarded with stories about them all the time – and yet for whatever reason you can’t get one of them into your home. Once it does finally happen for you, I look forward to reading all about it. Hang in there.

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