My husband and I recently traveled to Puerto Rico to meet up with some friends. Beach and weather was fine and whatnot…it was a nice getaway but not a place that I HAVE to return to. We can talk about that later…any whoooo….
While taking a stroll to explore San Juan we happened upon a vendor selling homemade ice cream. The hubster is a bit of an ice cream junkie so he couldn’t resist. There was a lot of pointing and guesturing since then ice cream man barely spoke more English than my husband spoke Spanish – which is to say, absolutely none at all. He could count though and had those English numbers down pat. Unfortunately, they didn’t figure out that the ice cream man didn’t have enough change until he had already scooped some mango ice cream into a little plastic cup and handed it over to me.
So now, what to do? I’m standing there with the ice cream running down my hand while they attempt to figure this out using their limited language skills. I didn’t want to eat the man’s ice cream in case they couldn’t figure this transaction. I’m trying to balance the ice cream and fumble around in my purse for change while simultaneously look around for strangers to help.
Finally, the ice cream man gets change from the parking lot guy, my husband gives him a tip for his trouble, grabs the ice cream out of my hand and proceeds to admonish me for letting it melt so much.When I told him that I was trying to help, he gave me a look and told me that it wasn’t my business to fix it and that he was handling it. My only job was to look pretty and eat my ice cream.
It was such a minor thing but it struck me as a blessing and a good lesson for me. For the past 30 plus years, I’ve cultivated the fixer mentality. I an the planner, the maintainer, the advisor in many relationships with my friends and family. Before Wood and I were married, if something wasn’t working right, I had to figure it out and make it happen by myself. But I am blessed to have someone by my side who is ready, willing and more than capable of sharing those concerns. And in many cases, he feels it is his role to take the lead, allowing me to sit back and look pretty.
I appreciate that. While I was in my younger dating days, I longed for someone to make me feel like a lady. Someone that made it okay for me not to have to be strong all the time. Someone that felt encouraged, or even esteemed to do for his woman. I know this is all kind of wrong to some women but l’m grateful for him.