There is something to be said about solitude…when you want it. I crave being alone. I like to luxuriate between my sheets, stretching out my limbs, wiggling my appendages without constriction. I love walking around leisurely, taking pictures of whatever strikes my fancy. I like to listen to NPR in my car or whatever podcasts I’ve loaded up on the iPod. I like to load up books on my tablet and go to my favorite sushi and eat at the bar – by myself. I’ve traveled by myself in South Africa and Mauritius. So I like being by myself – a lot.
But on the other hand, I love having people around. I wish I lived in a place where people could stop by. I want folks in my kitchen, talking to me while I cook. I would love to have dinner at my house every week – a whole tribe of folks who love and support each other. I want my family close, or some sort of family structure. I need people in my life.
A bunch of contradictions…I guess I would call myself an extroverted introvert.
I didn’t used to be like this. I remember when I first joined INROADS and they told me I had to learn to look people in the eye. My best friend from elementary told me that she remembered me being shy. I used to hate working on teams because I had to talk to people. Yet, I always had friends. I always was able to get people moving in a certain direction and getting them excited about an activity. My friend in college said she didn’t know why people were friends with me because I was mean…but friendly at the same time. Now I think I’m just mainly friendly – the meanness has mostly worn off. Good thing.