Father’s Day

The other day my mother-in-law asked me what I was going to get Bear for Father’s Day. I hesitated and she hurried to fill in the blank spaces with some sort of embarrassed, well, you know, kind of statement. Of the four sons, Bear is the only one without a child. When we go to family events and nieces and nephews, 2nd and 3rd generations of cousins show up with their offspring, he is happy for them. But he questions why does it seem so easy for them and still we wait. It is an on-going source of grief.

Should I wish him Happy Father’s Day if no child was ever born? Does fathering a child even if it ends in miscarriage count? Does wanting to be a father so badly make him one?

Hopefully this will be the last father’s day where he doesn’t get to participate. I pray that next year he will be the recipient of phone calls and well wishes, cards, balloons and special gifts. I pray I will get to tell him Happy Father’s Day next year.

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