I’m tired ya’ll.
I feel like the medicine has worn me down, the doctor appointments, work, and just the stress of not knowing. And then I feel guilty. I read about women who have gone through multiple YEARS of meeting with doctors, many failed months of timing cycles, and then moving on to months of attempting to get diagnosis, and then Clomid cycles, then IUIs, then failed IVFs and are still trying. So who am I to be tired after two weeks of taking injections.
But I am.
I’m tired of feeling like our family is incomplete. I’m tired of my husband being sad. I’m tired of people asking me if I have kids. I’m tired of my grandmother telling me she is just holding on so she can see my child. I’m tired of my mother feeling like she’ll never have grandkids. I’m tired of having pregnancy discussions with people who are pregnant and I’m not. I’m tired of kid-centered discussions. I’m tired of looking at this empty bedroom that’s earmarked for a baby. I’m tired of thinking about it.