The Bear is Coming

The time that we have been planning for is coming soon. Bear and I will finally be in the same place at the same time for an extended period. We are both excited and nervous about it which has been characterized by intensely getting on each other’s last dang nerves. The reality is, we go through this right before we are about to see each other again, probably because the time apart has been so long we are really missing each other. We last saw each other in April. So it’s time.

This will be a big change for both of us. I’m extremely proud of Bear because not only did he allow me back into his life, he is also taking the chance of a lifetime by quitting his job and moving across the world to support me in my job. He won’t be working, at least not in the beginning, and this may have all sorts of impact on our relationship. For Bear, this expresses itself in different ways: unwarranted jealousy and higher than normal need for affirmation. He may also feel some kind of way with knowing that he is not making his own money. But I believe that can be fixed fairly easily with a bank account and the stipend that the company provides for spouses. Plus, he’s already had some interest in his skills for work here, and we have a great idea for a business for expats. He will also be busy finishing up his last class for his degree. There are also some trailing male spouses both at my company as well as some folks at other companies. I think in a couple of months he will be acclimated and will have enough to do

On the good part, I can’t wait to experience Nigeria with Bear. We live in a great comfortable house, in a nice estate with swimming pool, gym, etc. We have a stewardess who cleans and cooks, we will have a driver. There is a great nightlife here so I’m looking forward to going out after work with him to get a drink or listen to music. We can travel to so many places from here, particularly on the many Nigerian holidays. Plus, I’m just happy that we will be together starting a life together. And it goes without saying that we are looking forward to trying again for another baby.


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