How Not to Prepare for Mid-Terms

1. DO NOT schedule all of your classes on Mondays and Thursdays increasing the probability that you will have multiple midterms on the same day, if at all possible.
2. DO NOT ignore the fact that you DO have TWO miderms on the same day, in particular, this upcoming Thursday.
3. DO NOT spend the weekend before your midterms sleeping, cleaning up your house and talking on the phone.
4. DO NOT spend the Tuesday before your Thursday midterms laying on the couch watching court TV and once again, talking on the phone, when you could spend that time studying.
5. DO NOT fill up he entire day before your Thursday midterms with various meetings, leaving you no time to study during the day.
6. DO NOT, upon knowing that your day is full, still decide that you are going to spend 2 1/2 hours at a workshop on video editing for the sole purpose of edition your South Africa GATE trip videos, thereby shortening your time to study.
7. DO NOT rely on being able to use the formula sheet of a classmate who took the class last year from a different professor, leaving you no alternative but to start creating a new formula sheet from scratch at 10:00 PM.
8. DO NOT decide to begin studying for your second midterm at 1:00 AM, particularly if your study method is just to read the problem sheet and answers without actually working the problems.
9. DO NOT drink two Mountain Dews in a 3-hour time span, causing you to decide at 12:30 AM that the hallway is a good place to practice cartwheels.
10. DO NOT leave the building at 4:00 AM, after have forgotten to move your car to a closer parking space, therefore having to cut through a heavily wooded space and have extreme thoughts about someone finding your mutilated body in the morning.
11. DO NOT set your alarm for 6:30 AM after dragging into bed at 4:30 AM and expect to wake up and be fully alert for your midterms.
12. DO NOT be surprised that there are whole sections of content on each of your midterms that you have never seen before, seeing as you only studied for appoximately 6 hours.
13. DO NOT think that your professor, or God even, will give you a pass, considering your piss-poor decision-making and preparation skills.

DO remember to read this before finals!!!


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